Thursday funny

[Aerosan]

Enjoy its a long one but worth it.
I wrote it slowly as Duck cant read fast!

A wealthy old lady decides to go on a photo safari in Africa, taking her faithful aged poodle named Sweetie, along for the company. One day the poodle starts chasing butterflies and before long, Sweetie discovers that she's lost. Wandering about, she notices a leopard heading rapidly in
her direction with the intention of having lunch.
The old poodle thinks, "Oh, oh! I'm in deep doo-doo now!" Noticing some bones on the ground close by, she immediately settles down to chew on the bones with her back to the approaching cat. Just as the leopard is about to leap, the old poodle exclaims loudly, "Boy, that was one delicious leopard! I wonder if there are any more around here?"
Hearing this, the young leopard halts his attack in mid-strike, a look of terror comes over him and he slinks away into the trees. "Whew!", says the leopard, "That was close! That old poodle nearly had me!"
Meanwhile, a monkey who had been watching the whole scene from a nearby tree, figures he can put this knowledge to good use and trade it for protection from the leopard. So off he goes, but the old poodle sees him heading after the leopard with great speed, and figures that something must be up.
The monkey soon catches up with the leopard, spills the beans and strikes a deal for himself with the leopard. The young leopard is furious at being made a fool of and says, "Here, monkey, hop on my back and see what's going to happen to that conniving canine!"
Now, the old poodle sees the leopard coming with the monkey on his back and thinks, "What am I going to do now?", but instead of running, the dog sits down with her back to her attackers, pretending she hasn't seen them yet, and just then they get close enough to hear, the old poodle says: "Where's that damn monkey? I sent him off an hour ago to bring me another leopard!"

Moral of this story: Respect the old...Bullsh!t and brilliance only come with age and experience!

[Duck Rogers]

Moral of this story........

Thanks for the compliment San, I accept graciously and with modesty :D :D

Duck Rogers

[Aerosan]

at least you r one of the youngest old men I know

[The Agent]

Is dit nou alweer n wilde weste thread hierdie.

[Duck Rogers]

at least you r one of the youngest old men I know

Geez, I'm getting worried now....

Duck Rogers

[Tailspin]

Hey there is nothing wrong with the wild west

At least we do not come from the bermude Triangle ??

[Morph]

Hey there is nothing wrong with the wild west

The Lone Ranger and Tonto went camping in the desert. After they got their tent all set up, both men fell sound asleep.

Some hours later,Tonto wakes the Lone Ranger and says, "Kemo Sabe, look towards sky, what you see?"

The Lone Ranger replies, "I see millions of stars."

"What that tell you?" asked Tonto.

The Lone Ranger ponders for a minute then says, "Astronomically speaking, it tells me there are millions of galaxies and potentially
billions of planets. Astrologically, it tells me that Saturn is in Leo. Time
wise, it appears to be approximately a quarter past three in the morning. Theologically, it's evident the Lord is all-powerful and we are small and insignificant. Meteorologically, it seems we will have a beautiful day tomorrow. What's it tell you,Tonto?"

Tonto is silent for a moment, then says, "Kemo Sabe, you dumber then buffalo sh*t. Someone has stolen tent!

[Tailspin]

Buncha city slickers tracking alone through the wild west, their Indian guide stops and puts his ear to the ground - he says "Buffilo he come here"
the city slickers are very impressed and they very excitedly ask him "how do you know this, can you hear them through the earth ??"

Indian tracker says "No me F#&^%# ear now sticky ! "

[Tumbleweed]

Grumpy old grizzly bear, guts is turning- gippo guts, quats down for a relief.

Cute litte white bunny comes skipping by.

'Hi bear, mind if I join you?'

Bear just grunts, bunny quats alongside and starts intstituting small chat. Bear interupts with

'Don't you also suffer from the same problem?'

"No, what problem?."

" You know, does'nt shit ever stick to your fur?'

"no, absolutely not!"

So the bear grabs him and wipes his arse!.